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Things You People Wouldn't Believe

Special Containment Procedures

SCP-3613 instances are to be kept in standard humanoid containment cells on floor 19 of Site-88. Under no circumstances are the location of these objects to be disclosed to any agents of Marshall, Carter and Dark1. Physical testing of SCP-3613 instances requires permission of the SCP-3613 project head and Site-88 director Phillip Foster.


SCP-3613 is a collection of 4 humanoid robots (possessing the instance designations SCP-3613-1 through -4). While these instances are theoretically capable of anomalous physical and mental performance, none display abilities above that of the human baseline. These instances also express a belief that they are the immediate family of an individual identified as Jacob Jefferson (a known agent of Marshall, Carter and Dark).

On October 31st 2013 Jacob Jefferson and his immediate family were the victims of a traffic accident. Mr. Jefferson was the only survivor of the incident, suffering a class A spinal cord injury which resulted in tetraplegia. Mr. Jefferson has since fully recovered from these injuries.

Documentation recovered from Anderson Robotics2 indicates that the SCP-3613 instances are part of a family replacement program initiated by Marshall, Carter and Dark in order to ensure employee loyalty. The following communication was intercepted on November 8th 2013:

Dear Mr. Carter,

I'm going to be honest. Hearing that you were interested in our androids for the purpose of replacing family members gave me pause at first. Once your assistant explained the purpose and process though, I have to say this is an ingenious idea. Your agent, Mr. Hr'asm'Kal3, delivered the Jefferson family's spirits this afternoon. We'll be loading them into the generation 3 models tonight. By tomorrow this man should have his family back.

I know this is just good business for you, but it's always a joy when good business and doing the right thing align. Please give my best to Mr. Jefferson. It's ironic that he's got a much longer road to recovery than his family, but at least they'll be there to get him through it.


SCP-3613-3 was damaged cosmetically during a bullying incident at Gulf Shores High School in Baldwin County, Alabama on March 18th, 2015. Police reports of the incident led Foundation agents to the hospital where the damaged instance was being treated.

The follow-up investigation resulted in all instances being identified and captured. During this incident Mr. Jefferson was acting as head of security at a Marshall, Carter and Dark auction in Atlanta, Georgia.