SCP-3302

Description

SCP-3302 is a single DVD, specifically disc one of season one of the U.S. version of the television sitcom, “The Office.” Notably, it is autographed by actor John Krasinski with the dedication, “If all else fails, mug thirty degrees to either side.” This is suspected to be a reference to a reaction colloquially known as “The Jim Look,” named for the character he portrayed on the show.

SCP-3302’s anomalous properties manifest when viewed by human beings. From the point of the first “Jim Look” onward, viewers will uncontrollably recreate the “Jim Look” action every time they perceive a statement as unintelligent. This reaction will go unnoticed by the subject unless brought to their attention; repeatedly bringing this to their attention may cause non-anomalous emotional distress at their apparent lack of self-control.

Interview Log:

Subject: D-3086 (Initial owner of SCP-3302)
Interviewer: Researcher Evans

[BEGIN LOG]

Evans: How are you doing today D-3086?

D-3086: At least the food’s better than the swill they served at the homeless shelter.

Evans: I’m glad to hear that. (Evans’ watch beeps.) Oh, one moment… My shoes are on the wrong feet, but that’s okay because I have two left feet anyway; either way I’ve got it right.

D-3086 looks to the left of Researcher Evans. He then returns his gaze to Researcher Evans and continues the conversation.

D-3086: Yeah, so?

Evans: No reason. Our background check shows that you only recently became homeless. Can you elaborate on why?

D-3086: I really don’t know… I had my life all together, but one day my wife just started getting mad at everything I did. Didn’t matter that I didn’t even say nothing, she just thought I was making fun of her all the time and got so riled up that she kicked me out of the damn house! I just kind of wandered around a while with the only things I could grab on the way out.

Evans: Yes, the possessions you were discovered with. (Evans’ watch beeps.) Ah, Star Wars: Episode One was definitely the best of the entire series, wouldn’t you agree?

D-3086 looks slightly to the right of Researcher Evans. He then returns his gaze to Researcher Evans and continues the conversation.

D-3086: No, I wouldn’t. But what’s that got to do with anything?

Evans: Sorry, just a random thought. Continue please, what happened after you were thrown out by your wife?

D-3086: Well, I just kind of wandered for a while, but everywhere I went, people would say two sentences to me and just flip out like I was some kind of jerk. I didn’t do anything to them! Even your agent fella who approached me in the soup line was kind of a jerk.

Evans: I’m sorry to hear it. Is there anything we can do to make your stay here more comfortable?

D-3086 looks to the right of Researcher Evans.

D-3086: You mean in my cell?

Evans: Point taken.

[END LOG]

Addendum 02/16/2018: A letter was found underneath D-3086’s pillow despite no signs of containment breach. The letter read:

OHMYGOD I LOVE IT WHEN ████ LOOKS AT THE CAMERA ITS SOOOOO FUNNNY IM HIS BIGGEST FAN I CANT WAIT TILL YOU VISIT ████-██████ FOR ██████CON

-[Indecipherable]

Testing of SCP-3302 postponed while the Unreality Department investigates the possibility and ramifications of extradimensional “viewership.”