SCP-3149

Monkey Business

SCP-3149-1-29 in its enclosure. At the time this picture was taken, SCP-3149-1-29 possessed the personality of American author Dan Brown.

Special Containment Procedures

The building containing SCP-3149 is currently owned by the Foundation and has been completely sealed from the public. At least two security personnel are to guard the entrance to SCP-3149 at all times. Any individuals attempting to gain access to the building are to be apprehended, interviewed and released after administration of amnestics.

All specimens of SCP-3149-1 are to be stored in an enclosure at Site-10 and fed twice a day in accordance with Nutritional Chart 3149-1-1. Any testing involving SCP-3149-1 must be approved by at least one member of Level 3 personnel.

Due to their relative docility while inside SCP-3149, all specimens of SCP-3149-2 are to be contained within it. Observational equipment within SCP-3149 is to be used to confirm the presence of all SCP-3149-2 specimens at all times.

Description

SCP-3149 is an extra-dimensional space accessible by walking backwards through an empty doorframe located in an abandoned office in Los Angeles, California. Graffiti next to the doorframe provides the following instructions for accessing SCP-3149:

YOU DO THE HOKEY POKEY AND YOU TURN AROUND

Upon walking backwards through the doorframe, the individual concerned is instantly transported to SCP-3149, the interior of which resembles a large warehouse. No natural sources of light are visible through the windows of SCP-3149, and all attempts to breach through its boundaries have been unsuccessful. The primary contents of SCP-3149 in terms of objects are one hundred desks, one hundred laptop computers¹ atop these desks, one hundred printers placed below each desk, a large chute in the center of the room, and when first discovered, the corpse of one elderly woman². A free standing doorframe is also present in SCP-3149, allowing individuals to exit it using the same method.

Evidence suggests SCP-3149 was a facility utilized by GoI-1783 ("Westhead Media") for the purpose of mass-producing written literature, primarily via a workforce of SCP-3149-1 specimens.

SCP-3149-1 is the collective designation for, at the time of writing, seventy-three³ Formosan rock monkeys⁴ originally found producing literature within SCP-3149. All specimens of SCP-3149-1 differ from non-anomalous specimens of their species in that they possess a large opening on their back intended to be filled with written works. Despite the presence of this opening, the bodies of SCP-3149-1 specimens appear to be able to function as normal.

When a written work is inserted into the back of an SCP-3149-1 specimen, they will adopt the personality and memories of that work's original author. Despite receiving a human personality, the SCP-3149-1 specimen will remain unable to vocalize outside the extent of that possible for a monkey, making non-verbal communication necessary. When first brought into Foundation custody, the SCP-3149-1 specimens were determined to have identical personalities to a number of famous and successful authors, with the exception of severe trauma brought about by their time in SCP-3149.

Use of SCP-3149-1 specimens for intelligence and historical purposes is under consideration pending a verdict from the Ethics Committee.

An aggressive specimen of SCP-3149-2.

SCP-3149-2 is the collective designation for ten organisms superficially resembling lampreys of abnormally large sizes, reaching heights of 1.5 meters and lengths of 3 meters. Despite their resemblance to lampreys, specimens of SCP-3149-2 are land-based and move by slithering across the ground. Analysis of the bodies of SCP-3149-2 specimens has shown that they have little in the way of internal organs, suggesting they are animated through anomalous means. SCP-3149-2 specimens are docile towards individuals from outside SCP-3149 unless one attempts to remove them, at which point they will become hostile until allowed to return to their original position.

When a specimen of SCP-3149-1 fails to meet its quota of one page every ten minutes, the nearest specimen of SCP-3149-2 will move to their position and exact physical punishment. This largely consists of blunt force inflicted using SCP-3149-2's tail or lacerations using SCP-3149-2's mouth. These attacks are invariably focused on the legs and torso of the specimen of SCP-3149-1, presumably so that they remain able to use their hands for writing purposes. While these injuries are painful, they are rarely permanently damaging. This is also presumed to be intentional on the part of SCP-3149-2, as they have proven capable of inflicting greater injuries during attempts to remove them from SCP-3149.

SCP-3149 was initially located following the successful escape of a single SCP-3149-1 specimen, which came to the Foundation's attention following several 911 calls reportedly made by a monkey. The agents who proceeded to the source of these calls were then directed to SCP-3149 by the SCP-3149-1 specimen in question.

Interview 3149-1

Upon initial containment, an interview was conducted with SCP-3149-1-2 by Doctor McCall. SCP-3149-1-2 is viewed as a leader figure by the other specimens of SCP-3149-1 due to seniority and, as a result, more experience with appeasing their captors. Interview was conducted using a text-to-speech interface for SCP-3149-1-2.

Interviewer: Dr. McCall
Interviewee: SCP-3149-1-2

<Begin Interview>

Dr. McCall: Well, ah, I suppose I should refer to you as 'Agatha'.

SCP-3149-1-2: No.

Dr. McCall: I'm sorry?

SCP-3149-1-2: I am not Agatha Christie. I am a copy of Agatha Christie. This was made clear to me before your people arrived.

(Pause.)

Dr. McCall: I see. May I ask, what was the last thing you remember before your captivity?

SCP-3149-1-2: Dying. At my house.

Dr. McCall: Oh. I'm sure that must have been disconcerting.

SCP-3149-1-2: Indeed. Then I wake up in the body of a chimp in a warehouse, and told to write.

Dr. McCall: Told to write by who exactly?

SCP-3149-1-2: The old woman. The Swede. She worked for a company, a thing called Westhead. That was all she told me. That, and how much I was to write. The rest she left to the Bookworms.

Dr. McCall: You had no further interaction with her?

SCP-3149-1-2: Aside from her coming to deliver our food, none.

Dr. McCall: Hm. I'm led to believe you're a leader among the people found within SCP-3149?

SCP-3149-1-2: What?

(Pause.)

Dr. McCall: Oh, sorry — the warehouse.

SCP-3149-1-2: Ah. I'm a leader only in that I was one of the first ones made to work there. The one before me killed himself shortly after my arrival. Threw himself under one of the Bookworms.

Dr. McCall: I…I see.

SCP-3149-1-2: I don't remember his name. He was either after my time or far before it. I'm the only copy of me, I'm sure of that. There are twenty-seven of someone called J.K. Rowling. They would fight about that, about who of them were real, scratching and spitting like they really were monkeys.

Dr. McCall: Yes, we've become, ah, familiar with their behaviour.

SCP-3149-1-2: I'd imagine soi [sic]. Please forgive me. I am very tired.

Dr. McCall: We'll return you to the enclosure shortly.

SCP-3149-1-2: And when will we be leaving?

(Pause.)

SCP-3149-1-2: We're not, are we? We should have just run. Not called the police at all.

Dr. McCall: If I may say so, Miss Christie —

SCP-3149-1-2: I am not Agatha Christie. I am a monkey, and you are all but zookeepers.

<End Log>

Addendum 3149-1 (SCP-3149-1 Living and Working Conditions)

Testimony from SCP-3149-1 specimens suggests they were subjected to rigorous work hours during their time in SCP-3149, being permitted only five hours of sleep a day and during said work hours, being required to complete one page of narrative every ten minutes or be punished by attending SCP-3149-2 specimens. Feeding took place once a day. Inspection of the food provided to SCP-3149-1 show that while being insufficient in terms of nutrition for Formosan rock monkeys, they contain numerous chemicals that intensify creative impulses.

Upon completion of a narrative, SCP-3149-1 specimens were ordered to place it into the chute at the center of SCP-3149. Analysis of this chute shows that documents inserted into it⁵ disappear from their position during their descent, presumably being transported to a Westhead Media distribution facility. Narratives written by SCP-3149-1 and deposited in the chute have been found on sale in numerous anomalous communities, including Three Portlands, the state of Lee, and Backdoor So-Ho. The side of the chute bears the following text:

Westhead Media: What's Yours Is Ours

Inspection of the living quarters of SCP-3149-1 has revealed a large amount of documents made using paper smuggled from the main workspace of SCP-3149. These documents were presumably written by specimens of SCP-3149-1. This is difficult to verify, however, as the specimens of SCP-3149-1 collectively refuse to share information regarding their captivity due to suspicions regarding the Foundation's intentions. Although the recovered documents are brief, presumably due to a combination of exhaustion and near-constant oversight from employees of Westhead Media, they most commonly call for the specimens of SCP-3149-1 to escape, 'kill the woman', and 'enact revolution.'

Several severely decomposed SCP-3149-1 corpses are also present in these living quarters. According to the limited information the SCP-3149-1 specimens have been willing to share, these were kept there as a warning after numerous escape attempts.

Addendum 3149-2 (Sample of Produced Narrative)

Addendum 3149-3

Footnotes