SCP-2395

Description

SCP-2395 is a giant price tag, located at 82°08'02.1"S 16°59'05.5"W in Antarctica. Observing aerial drones have recorded SCP-2395 to have the price of "$҉ 585.98" [sic].

SCP-2395 is tied to a small rebar loop embedded in the ground by a 0.7m length of twine. SCP-2395's dimensions are 258m by 90m in length and width; a 2.5 m layer of Polyethylene covers the paper inscribed with SCP-2395's price.

SCP-2395 possesses unpredictable centrifugal and centripetal movement around the rebar loop, usually being manipulated and shifted by unknown forces in random directions and velocities. One instance has occurred where SCP-2395 maintained a constant velocity of approximately 65km/h on the date of 11/2/16, spinning clockwise for 49 seconds. Researchers note the twine that secures SCP-2395 to the rebar loop may possess anomalous tensile properties.

SCP-2395-A is a wooden shack located 0.3km east of SCP-2395. The structure is empty, save for a room in which an unknown individual, presumably a human female, prohibits access from within. The door to their room is engraved with the initials "L.C.E." This individual (designated SCP-2395-B) has responded to no verbal communication, but has occasionally been recorded conversing with other entities.

8/2/1968] After numerous attempts to establish an interview with SCP-2395-B, surveillance cameras recorded a saw protruding from the door, creating a rectangular hole akin to a mail slot, and a scrap of paper being pushed out. A written message on the paper contained the following:

fine, write down questions and ill get to them in my down time

Dr. Mill from Area-30 was brought to communicate with SCP-2395-B, and suggested continued usage of paper notes to recover more information. Note that SCP-2395-B's responses are received in one to two days following Dr. Mill's responses.

Mill: So if you would prefer I pass notes like this, rather than converse, all I'd like to do is ask a few questions regarding your environment and role, would this be fine?

2395-B: ≤10 words or else you're wasting my time

Mill: Could you explain why you're here?

2395-B: It's fricking cold all day and I have work

Mill: What kind of work?

2395-B: I'm waiting for purchase offers. The price isn't set in stone, but this is the kind of minimum we have to offer to make a profit

Mill: So you're working for an organization?

2395-B: You blind or something, name's on the door

Mill: Can you explain the price tag's movement?

2395-B: Already said I'm trying to make a sale here.

Mill: What exactly are you selling?

2395-B: Earth.

Mill: Please elaborate.

2395-B: Earth, planet, terra nova, blue ball of life, flesh cesspool, etcetera.

Mill: That doesn't explain the price tag's movement.

2395-B: Well, you know when you pick up a stick with a dying leaf on it? Or when you pick up something at a store with a price tag attached to it and inspect it a bit, and the price tag might flop around a bit? And you might grab the price tag to get a look at the price? Now imagine something else looking at that price tag. Actually scratch that, since you can't.

You getting it now? We're selling the Earth. And I'm busy speaking to willing buyers.

Addendum 2395-LC" id="addendum-2395-q-strong-ttspan-styletext-decoration-underline8-2-1968-span-tt-after-numerous-attempts-to-establish-an-interview-with-scp-2395-b-surveillance-cameras-recorded-a-saw-protruding-from-the-door-creating-a-rectangular-hole-akin-to-a-mail-slot-and-a-scrap-of-paper-being-pushed-out-a-written-message-on-the-paper-contained-the-following-p-blockquote-pfine-write-down-questions-and-ill-get-to-them-in-my-down-time-p-blockquote-pdr-mill-from-area-30-was-brought-to-communicate-with-scp-2395-b-and-suggested-continued-usage-of-paper-notes-to-recover-more-information-note-that-scp-2395-bs-responses-are-received-in-one-to-two-days-following-dr-mills-responses-p-blockquote-pstrongmill-strong-so-if-you-would-prefer-i-pass-notes-like-this-rather-than-converse-all-id-like-to-do-is-ask-a-few-questions-regarding-your-environment-and-role-would-this-be-fine-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-10-words-or-else-youre-wasting-my-time-p-pstrongmill-strong-could-you-explain-why-youre-here-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-its-fricking-cold-all-day-and-i-have-work-p-pstrongmill-strong-what-kind-of-work-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-im-waiting-for-purchase-offers-the-price-isnt-set-in-stone-but-this-is-the-kind-of-minimum-we-have-to-offer-to-make-a-profit-p-pstrongmill-strong-so-youre-working-for-an-organization-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-you-blind-or-something-names-on-the-door-p-pstrongmill-strong-can-you-explain-the-price-tags-movement-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-already-said-im-trying-to-make-a-sale-here-p-pstrongmill-strong-what-exactly-are-you-selling-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-earth-p-pstrongmill-strong-please-elaborate-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-earth-planet-terra-nova-blue-ball-of-life-flesh-cesspool-etcetera-p-pstrongmill-strong-that-doesnt-explain-the-price-tags-movement-p-pstrong2395-b-strong-well-you-know-when-you-pick-up-a-stick-with-a-dying-leaf-on-it-or-when-you-pick-up-something-at-a-store-with-a-price-tag-attached-to-it-and-inspect-it-a-bit-and-the-price-tag-might-flop-around-a-bit-and-you-might-grab-the-price-tag-to-get-a-look-at-the-price-now-imagine-something-else-looking-at-that-price-tag-actually-scratch-that-since-you-cant-p-pyou-getting-it-now-were-selling-the-earth-and-im-busy-speaking-to-willing-buyersbr-p-blockquote-pstrongaddendum-2395-lc">Addendum 2395-Q: [8/2/1968] After numerous attempts to establish an interview with SCP-2395-B, surveillance cameras recorded a saw protruding from the door, creating a rectangular hole akin to a mail slot, and a scrap of paper being pushed out. A written message on the paper contained the following: